resilience in midlife – Menopause & Malarkey

If you’ve been wondering where I’ve been, allow me to assure you:
I did not fall in love, run away to Scotland, or get abducted by a man with a fish photo and unearned confidence.

I moved.

Which means my life recently consisted of cardboard boxes, donation piles, sore muscles, and that specific kind of exhaustion where even your thoughts need a nap.

Illustrated, Disney-style scene of a smiling woman with light gray hair and green eyes standing among moving boxes in a cozy, sunlit room. She wears casual clothes and looks calm and confident despite the chaos. A tan Chihuahua stands alert at her feet, and a white Corgi lounges nearby like a cat. The scene conveys humor, resilience, and a lighthearted take on moving and fresh starts. — Proof that fresh starts don’t have to be perfect to be meaningful. 🏡✨

But there’s another reason for the quiet.
I stopped looking at the apps.
Not dramatically.
Not with my own personal declaration of independence.
I just… didn’t open them.

And friends, let me tell you something shocking:
Nothing bad happened.
No missed soulmate notifications.
No algorithm-induced heartbreak.
No urgent need to evaluate a man’s relationship with punctuation, hats, or freshwater bass.

Illustrated three-panel graphic titled “Meanwhile, on Dating Apps.” The left panel shows a shirtless, muscular older man taking a mirror selfie in a bathroom. The center panel shows a smiling man outdoors holding a large fish while wearing sunglasses and a camouflage shirt. The right panel shows a man in a sleeveless tank top taking a serious mirror selfie indoors. The image humorously represents common dating-app photo stereotypes. — Abs fade. Fish rot. Bathroom selfies are forever.

Instead, I unpacked.
I breathed.
I laughed at things that didn’t involve a dating profile promising “hot fun” like it was a Groupon.

And when I did peek back in recently?
Oh, my stars and garters.

The apps were exactly as I left them.

Still confidently delivering men who:
✅️Think “chemistry” is something you spray on
✅️Believe three-word profiles count as a personality
✅️Are one midnight message away from a public safety announcement
✅️Look like they accidentally photo-bombed a picture of their bathroom sinks

Meanwhile, the ads have escalated. 🙄
Everywhere I look is a suspiciously ripped silver fox who absolutely does not exist, staring into the camera like an AI Romeo.

Well, maybe like Romeo’s AI grandpa.

At some point I had to ask myself:
Is this dating… or performance art? 🤔

So consider this post a reset.
No pressure.
No promises.
No pretending I’ve been “actively looking” when I’ve actually been actively choosing peace, furniture placement, and sleep.

Menopause & Malarkey isn’t going anywhere.
Red Flag Friday will return.
Mischief Monday is stretching and hydrating.

I’m still here.
Still observant.
Still amused.
Just a little more unpacked — literally and figuratively.

Carry on. 😌🔥

A reflection on late-blooming strength, rediscovered creativity, and the surprising places healing takes us.

There are moments in life when you look backward, then forward, then at the ground beneath your feet — and you realize you’re standing somewhere you never imagined, stronger than you expected.

This week, I caught myself feeling something I haven’t felt in a long time:
proud.
grounded.
steady.
And maybe most importantly… ready.

Ready for what?
Not men. Not dating apps. Not romance with a side of mystery shovels.
Ready for me.

Ready to keep writing.

Not the timid scribbles I used to produce in my 20s, but the bold, layered, soulful work that only comes with time — and life — and loss — and joy — and more experience than anyone ever asks for.

My creativity didn’t return quietly.
She came back at 55 with sass, steel, and an entire toolbox of stories she refused to keep inside my chest any longer.
She came with decades of women’s wisdom, mother-worry, step-parent diplomacy, blended family chaos, heartbreak, healing, gray hair earned the honest way, and a bachelor’s degree I fought my way toward at 47.

She came back mature, fierce, vulnerable, funny, gritty, and brilliant in ways my 25-year-old self couldn’t even dream of.

Ready to honor the life I’ve lived.

Two marriages that ended on purpose.
One that ended out of my control.
Daughters who grew into women.
Grandkids who became pure magic in human form.
Parents who left too soon.
A husband whose death changed the shape of my soul.
Jobs, losses, reinventions, dogs with big personalities and tiny bladders, and holding space for my kids when their own hearts broke.

Every bit of it taught me something.
Every bit of it honed me.
Every bit of it brought me here.

Ready to embrace the quiet triumphs.

The kind that don’t make noise.
The kind that happen in soft moments.
The kind that whisper, not shout:

“You made it.
And you’re okay.”

Sometimes that looks like writing a chapter that feels like truth.
Sometimes it looks like house-sitting with three snoring dogs.
Sometimes it looks like remembering you once slept in a room with someone you loved who’s no longer here — and choosing grace for your own heart when it feels unsettled.

And sometimes it looks like taking a bucket-list cruise to Alaska and unknowingly changing the entire trajectory of your life.

Ready for whatever comes next.

Not because I’m fearless.
Not because I’m finished grieving.
Not because life suddenly makes perfect sense.

But because I’m still standing —
and I’m standing taller than before.

Here’s to the late bloomers.
The reinvented.
The resilient.
The women who rise again and again, softer and stronger each time.

And here’s to the muse who came back with a vengeance.
I’ve missed her.
But she came home.
And she brought stories with her.

Tag: resilience in midlife

A Brief Intermission (Featuring Boxes, Bad Algorithms, and Blessed Silence)

I’m Still Standing — and Somehow Standing Taller